About

I am a teacher, a parent, a writer, and a rape survivor.  My name is not really Aimee, nor do I really live in Colorado.  I wish to remain anonymous, but I do not want my story to go untold.  My hope with this blog is that other women can read my stories and comments and feel safe to share their own stories.  If you wish to share, you can leave a comment, or email me privately.  I will then write your story, let you see it first, and then add your story to my blog.  You can change your name and all identifying information…I completely understand.  If we can help even one woman deal with her pain, we will be succeeding 🙂

If you’re new to the blog, hop on back to the first few entries…”My Story” and “Your Story” to get an idea what the blog is all about.

Also, take a minute to take my poll.

19 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. dancingwarrior55
    Sep 14, 2012 @ 20:52:09

    I am new to blogging, and really appreciated your comment. I am lookinf forward to reading your older blogs, because I really like what I have read so far. Your courage is inspiring — and we need all of us strong, wonderful survivors! I have an idea about gathering some empowered rape survivors together to create a safe space/circle for returning combat vets who are new to PTSD survival. The creation of the circle, forming ourselves into a safe space for each other first, is of course the necessary precursor to anything else. Have you any reactions or thoughts on this subject? Meg (Dancing Warrior)

    Reply

  2. Aimee
    Sep 14, 2012 @ 21:56:17

    Thank you for your lovely comments 🙂 I’m new to this as well. I was very scared at first, but now I am so glad I started this. I really hope to post more regularly…sorry for that! I think your idea is wonderful. I don’t know much about how combat vets handle it, there are probably similarities with rape survivors, but also some very significant differences. My only experience is with a cousin who came back from Viet Nam and had terrible flashbacks. It caused very violent reactions in him, which I’m assuming is different from rape survivors. My reaction is usually the opposite…paralyzing rather than acting out. But I think your premise is a good one, to create a safe space. Stay strong, and let me know if you move forward on this…I would love to help in any way I can 🙂

    Reply

  3. dancingwarrior55
    Sep 14, 2012 @ 22:13:26

    Thank you. My responses are paralyzing as well; I think what we have to offer combat vets is the safe space itself, including the space to speak their truth without being judged. I’ve known quite a few Vietnam Vets, and often what I found was that acknowledgement and acceptance went as far as they do for those of us who have survived sexual abuse of some kind. I’m not saying I want to give them a safe place to act out violently, but one in which they can discuss how and what they are feeling and experiencing without judgement. And there is something I cannot pinpoint, about human on human violence, that is telling me that dialogue between those who have inflicted and those who have received such violence is becoming necessary for the healing of the human soul. And such dialogue can only take place in safe space, in the spirit of unconditional love and forgiveness. I have no idea if this can even be done, but I feel compelled to try. I have no idea what would come of such a dialogue, and I’m afraid of the possibilities for damage that I see, so I’m trying to do a lot of homework on the possible issues involved before I even try to collect an actual group of people for this circle. I will certainly let you know!

    Reply

  4. unladylikemusings
    Sep 15, 2012 @ 01:51:38

    Hey Aimee, I just wanted to let you know that I nominated you for the One Lovely Blog Award at: http://unladylikemusings.wordpress.com/2012/09/14/one-lovely-blog-award/. Thank you for sharing your story. You are a strong and brave woman!

    Reply

  5. Aimee
    Sep 15, 2012 @ 10:44:34

    Oh my goodness…thank you so much Musings 🙂 I love your blog as well.

    Reply

  6. Aimee
    Sep 15, 2012 @ 10:46:42

    Now I better get writing my next post!!!

    Reply

  7. opt4
    Sep 19, 2012 @ 15:17:02

    Thank You so much for your blogs and for following Opt4. I can only say I’m sorry that crimes such as these go unchecked and that the rights of women seem second to the rights of men. Just know, that there are a lot of men speaking out against all abuse and violence! Thank you for your strength!

    Reply

    • Aimee
      Sep 19, 2012 @ 21:06:09

      Thanks for the comments, Opt…I really enjoy reading your blog as well. It’s always insightful. It’s good to know that men as well as women are behind this cause. Without men on our side, we can never stop abuse. Too often, it’s just considered a “women’s issue” when it’s really a humankind issue.

      Reply

  8. dancingwarrior55
    Sep 19, 2012 @ 23:03:23

    You are both absolutely right. It is vital to remember that both male children and adult men experience sexual violence, though for adult men the social stigma connected with sexual assault can be a real barrier to healing — and even to asking for the help that is available. For male children, the statistic used to be 7 out of 10 boys (as compared to 3 out of 4 girls) experience some form of sexual molestation, abuse, or assault before the age of 17. I don’t know what the current statistics show but I believe it remains much the same. Men who speak out against abuse are vital to our society’s attitudes toward sexual and domestic violence, and we must also acknowledge and remove the additional stigmas for male survivors as well. I wil check out your bog as soon as I can, Opt; perhaps you migt find mine of interest. It can be so time consuming to keep track of all the wonderful people with great blogs, but (especially for those like me who don’t have people in our daily life with whom we can discuss our issues) the effort is well worth it. I really want to thank you both for being out there! Blessed Be, Meg

    Reply

  9. Aimee
    Sep 21, 2012 @ 00:04:10

    Those statistics are so awful. I find it so hard to believe that so many people have experienced this. It breaks my heart.

    Reply

  10. dancingwarrior55
    Sep 21, 2012 @ 16:08:53

    Ialso forces us to wonder who all these people are, whether they are getting help and how we asa society are failing them by not making it safe to come forward. It is heartbreaking; but I’ve seen so many become stronger as they face what has happened to them that I have hope for what might emerge if we can reach more survivors.

    Reply

  11. buckwheatsrisk
    Sep 21, 2012 @ 21:03:05

    thank you so much for dropping by my site. i’m sorry you too have been raped.

    Reply

  12. Aimee
    Sep 23, 2012 @ 13:58:50

    Thanks for visiting, Buckwheats. I enjoyed reading some of your posts. I hope to visit back and finish reading 🙂

    Reply

  13. lossforwords360
    Oct 28, 2012 @ 11:29:44

    Love your blog! I think it’s awesome!

    Reply

  14. hermanchad
    May 24, 2013 @ 23:22:51

    I can’t thank you enough for your blog. Ideas I have posted on opt4 came from your ideas and posts. You were or are following a blog called opt4 whose goal was to prevent domestic violence and promote nonviolence. My name is Chad Herman, Visionary/Motivational speaker and I was writing that blog for over 3 years. Everything you saw on that blog was my creation…and I hope you liked it. Unfortunately, because of federal budget cuts, I no longer am able to keep up that blog. I hope that others will in my absence, but I don’t know. With that said: I have my own blog, motivatingforpositivechange.wordpress.com dedicated to the idea that “if we all did something to help a cause we truly believe in, we could change the world.” I still write about gender equality and nonviolence, in addition to multiple otrher causes and ways to continue creating positive change.Please check out motivatingforpositivecghange.wordpress,com. I promise you won’t be dissapointed!

    Reply

  15. Illicit By Nature
    Mar 26, 2014 @ 00:32:46

    I have nominated you for the Brave Heart Award,
    http://illicitbynature.com/2014/03/26/brave-heart-award/

    Thank you for your honesty in the posts you have uploaded so far, they have helped me and I look forward to reading your future posts. I am so sorry for what you have gone through.

    Best wishes, Louise.

    “Stand Strong You Are Not Alone
    I call you a survivor, because that is what you are. There are days when you don’t feel like a survivor and there are days when the memories trigger your past and it feels like you are losing the fight – but you are not. Take the past and heal with it. You are strong. I want you to know that the abuse was not your fault. It does not matter what age it happened. You did not deserve it, you did not cause it, and you did not bring it on yourself. You own no shame, guilt, or remorse. In your life, you have faced many demons but look around you and you will see there is hope, and there is beauty. You are beautiful, You are loved, there is hope. You deserve to be loved and treated with respect. You deserve peace and joy in your life. Don’t settle for anything less than that. God has plans for you. Your future does not have to be dictated by your past.”

    Reply

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