Is This What Mental Health Feels Like?

Well, I have now raised the concern of not one, but two of my followers because I haven’t posted in so long 🙂  I don’t blame them…I think the last time I went a month without posting was when my dad died.

First, I love that I have readers who notice that I’m gone.  How great is that?  Second, I’m just fine.

And so it begins…

The holiday season.

Many of you have been looking forward to the holidays.  Thoughts of turkeys roasting, pies baking, shopping madness, and time spent with family and friends have you filled with nostalgic happiness.

I normally am a big fan of the holidays.  But I’ve been dreading this particular holiday season for quite some time now.  And now here it is upon us and I’m not sure how I feel.

Father’s Day Cookies

I’m making a batch of angry cookies.  They’re in the oven right now, and frankly it pisses me off.

Oh, they’re chocolatey and gooey, and I’m sure they’re delicious.  But they’re making me really mad.

They’re Father’s Day cookies, for my husband’s father.  It was Hubby’s idea.  It seemed like a nice idea at the time.  So, I began assembling the ingredients.  I took out the eggs and slammed the refrigerator.  I got down the flour and slammed the cupboard door.  The poor eggs took quite a beating and I grumbled as I carefully picked eggshells out of the dough.  I yanked open the chocolate chips and burst into tears.

There are no words…

My dear readers, I have been gone a very long time. I spent November happily writing away at my novel. Then December came. With the winter weather, came a long struggle for our family. My father was critically ill. All through December, I watched this strong man wither and grow weaker by the day. He fought so very hard. But sadly, he lost his battle two weeks ago.

There are no words that can express how it feels to lose a parent. There are no words to fill the empty place in my heart.